I type this as I am in the process of losing my 7th pregnancy. You would think it would get easier , that it wouldn’t hurt as much – but each time a little bit more of me dies. I have had 2 ectopic pregnancies, and now 5 miscarriages. This time was different; this one definitely hurt the most. I did my first round of IVF and fell pregnant with the first try. From the start it didn’t start off well. Numbers weren’t increasing properly , then all of a sudden they stopped and brown discharge started today . I was told to get off all the meds I was taking, that the pregnancy would not be viable . This is my baby they were talking about . And now once again for the 7th time I am in the darkest place of my life , feeling alone , lost and helpless. All I want to do is hold my baby . I will do anything . I cannot tell you how I’m going to feel tomorrow or even an hour from now , but I can tell you I will never give up until I hold my baby in my arms.
